Monday, May 5, 2008

Roadtrip help. . .

The allure of the open road; discovering new places; the adventure of coming out of rest stops unmolested; 3,000 plus miles in an economy car with young children. Ahh, the Great American Road trip. It's what separates the red-blooded, flag tatooed members of our society from the pansy pinko commies. I'm afraid that my darling wife, April, has fallen into that later classification. Not only does she refuse to get an eagle with its wings spread clutching a banner which reads "In God We Trust" across her back a la tramp stamp, she thinks going on a road trip to see our family this summer is a crazy idea. Come on - I know somebody out there still has to love the U.S. of A. If we can't take car trips, we've let the terrorists win - Fox News even tells me so. Ask yourself, do you want to live in that America - the one where the terrorists and their "agenda" control life? I'm not even asking YOU to go on a road trip. We'll bring it back. By hell, the Conaway family will singly handedly bring back apple pie and baseball on the radio. We'll take the first step in saving this chosen land with our car trip. Who's behind me? Who loves this country? Who's brave enough to convince April?

P.S. - This is a shameless self promotion for you all to read my blog.

1 comment:

Rammells said...


Your incessent posturing about the evils of airports is simply fearmongering. You are a lame-duck husband and you know it. If you choose to stay the course and drive all the way to Colorado, history will not judge you kindly.

We both think Sean should be the one to get a tattoo. We propose Barbara Bush's face on his belly.